Salient. An Organ of Student Opinion at Victoria University, Wellington N.Z. Vol. 22, No. 1. March 2, 1959
Tales out of School the Fish that Got Away — Aussie Swimmers Make Whoopee
Tales out of School the Fish that Got Away
Aussie Swimmers Make Whoopee
How do they keep up the tempo?—This question was asked all over New Zealand when the Australian Universities swimming team visited here in January. All-night parties, training at 8 a.m. for two to three hours, sightseeing in the afternoon and carnivals in the evening, followed by parties, etc., etc.
The various swimming centres the team visited turned on everything they could want (we believe the chaps jacked up their own nurses), and the people who were left gasping were the hosts, especially when one boy stood on his head to drink his beer in Napier. The Australians had no sense of time or timetables; it is recorded that a bus was to leave Rotorua at 8.30—one of the girls turned up at 9.20!
"Jane, this is Bill; he'll take you home. Goodnight."
It is reported he left alone about 4.30 a.m.
When the team was travelling to Wanganui they heard the fire siren in Dannevirke. All piled out to watch and, much to their surprise, out came the engine being pushed to get it started. When it did start it went away with a roar—doing 20 m.p.h.
Referee Difficulty
Each carnival had its high points but the water polo played in the murky Gonville Pool, Wanganui, must go down as the strangest game of water polo of the tour. The referee, supposedly impartial, had great difficulty trying to guess what was going on under water, and therefore was in danger of ending up in the pool himself on many occasions.
On the Sunday afternoon four of the Australians helped judge the Miss Wanganui contest. Peculiarly enough, the winner was well-known to certain members of the team. One contestant from Napier had a peculiarly Australian twang, and one from Whangarei looked remarkably like a girl who had dived for N.Z.U. the previous night.—Coincidence ?
The Australians got used to the New Zealand habit of starting carnivals about ten minutes late. In Palmerston North, John Conroy, the Australian captain, was having a warm-up swim when at 7.30 sharp "The Queen" was played. How do you stand at attention in the middle of a swimming baths?
The team arrived in Wellington early—the only time on the tour! On the first night in Wellington a cocktail party was provided by a local sportsman who found the Aussies drank three times the amount of Steinecker he had anticipated. The Aussies spent the whole tour complaining about warm New Zealand beer, and this was cold. Who was responsible for the bottle of beer that was found in the oven after a party in Wellington? The oven at this time had been heated for cooking.
Parliament Receives
The first test in Wellington did not get by without its hitches. The team, having had a quiet time except for a Parliamentary reception on the Thursday morning, were ready for any antics. The chap with the mike lost the sheet with the order of presentation to the crowd and had to make a series of wild guesses with amusing results, including one of the Australians nearly stepping into the pool. It was remarked that the announcer knew the girls' names off pat, but had difficulty with the boys.
At the supper after the test, one of the Vic. Club was told he was having a party afterwards. There was not a drop at his place, but when the party was over he had two dozen, a nine-gallon keg and various quantities of the hard stuff. One chap from Palmerston North turned up to this party, having been at the ones in Wanganui and Palmerston North, and believe it or not, he is not a student.
When they got to the South Island various things happened: There was the chap who was left behind in Timaru on the way south; there were the trio who hitched to the Coast; and the manager who got the team out of bed at crack of dawn because they had to be in Christchurch to make the final arrangements with the shipping company—only to be dropped at Riccarton races on the way.
Who pinched a bus down south? Which mayor was it who had his table laid out with Australian magazines and never shut up about the beauties of the Cathedral? The Mayor of Invercargill had the pleasure of welcoming the absent Australians—they were at Milford. The team manager and captain arrived back in time to hear one of the chaps finishing a speech of thanks; and one of the girls arrived at the reception in time for a lift to the beach.
Police In
A policeman was seen walking down the wharf shortly after the "Maori" arrived in Wellington; under his arm was a pile of street signs, etc. We believe the police are still trying to "locate the location" of some mysterious places like Resthaven—home for elderly women.
Then there was the girl who, as a parting gesture, left her case with the Customs in Wellington, or the boy who got on board without a ticket and without going through Customs.
We believe the New Zealand manager and perhaps a few of the local swimmers are reticent to tell the other tales of the tour. If you want to know the rest then take the trip to Australia in two years time.
—C.P.