Chap. VII.

I Now return to the harbour of Miro-volante, where the fleet was page 254left at an anchor. It lies in 38º 15' south latitude, and in 132º 24' west longitude. I was very much and agreeably struck, with the appearance of this city from the water. The amazing extent of it, the superb domes, lofty spires, grand columns, magnificent palaces, &c. &c. all built in a light, airy, but pleasing architecture, of a perfectly new taste, made it seem worthy to be the capital of the world.

Several Merchants of the factory soon came on board, to congratulate us on our safe arrival; and with such honest earnestness pressed the Quadarow and the other Commanders, to take beds at their houses, that there was no refusing them. Moraveres was engaged to Moragow, the Commanders of the frigates to two others, page 255and myself to Nicophange. We went ashore with them to that quarter of the town where the Merchants lived for the conveniency of their commerce, called the city.

We dined that day with Morogow, where I was very much surprised to see a table set out with all the elegance and magnificence that could be well conceived, far surpassing any thing I had seen among the first nobility at Ludorow. After dinner, when we were drinking a sober glass of delicious wine, Moragow said to me (for Moraveres and the others had been there before), I observed your surprise at dinner, to see us Merchants live in so different a style from what is customary in Bonhommica, but I assure you it is not from choice but necessity. For as we are obliged to page 256have great connections with the Mirovolante Merchants, and to have them at our tables both by invitation and accidentally, we are obliged to comply with their manners. Besides, said he, if we did not, we could get no Luxo-voluptan servants to live with us, and we could not well do without some of them. I asked him, if he could account for that very great difference in the way of living, that was observable in these two nations. He answered, that the Luxo-voluptans pretended their sense of taste, or palate, was naturally formed more sensible of agreeable impressions than other nations. That even their philosophers were of that opinion, but for his part he believed it a vitiated taste, become from long habit a kind of second nature. From their exten-page 257five dominions in the southern hemisphere, continued he, and immense commerce, they had it in their power to indulge that vitiated taste, by ransacking half the globe for choice viands, the finest flavoured wines, and the most poignant sauces to gratify their appetite. But what will very much surprise you still continued he, is, that the meanest servant-maid in Miro-volante, must breakfast on the infusion of an herb, that is brought ten thousand leagues from this country, with the produce of a cane to sweeten it, which also comes from a great distance. I believe, said I in reply, That must be what we call in Britain Tea, and is brought from China. Their name for it, said he, is Cha, and probably is brought from the same country, to which they send page 258many ships yearly, to a port called Nanking. This shewed me the reason, why the English ships had never met any of theirs.

The discourse still continuing on their luxurious way of life, one of the company mentioned the great distance from which they brought an amphibious shell-animal alive (sometimes of immense size), which was one of their greatest regales. They dress it up in a rich wine, with many warm spices, said he, devouring it in such quantities, that they have loose dresses made on purpose for these feasts, their usual garments confining them too much. I plainly saw they meant turtle but out of regard to my own dear country, took no notice of the same beastly custom prevailing in it.

It occurred to me however to ask, if that way of life did not prejudice their healths. Very much, said Nicophange; it brings on the gout, and many other painful and lingering disorders, which make their lives miserable^*; but that neither deters others, nor (such is their propensity to these poisons) even the sufferers themselves from again indulging in them, as soon as the weakly and almost destroyed tone of their stomachs will permit. A rare country for physicians, cried I! That it is, said Moragow, and we abound with them. Besides the regular bred ones there are also irregulars in great numbers with their nostrums; and twenty quack medicines sold in book-page 260sellers shops as infallible remedies for every disease the human body is subject to. These we may reasonably conclude do much more harm than good; but a few real or sictitious cures well puffed in the news-papers, make the fortune of the proprietor of a medicine; as bold assertions have great weight with this credulous people, and none who have suffered by the use of it, are virtuous enough, or at least will give themselves the trouble to warn mankind against its pernicious effects.

It would be tedious to give the reader the whole conversation which passed, concerning this extraordinary people; but it seemed to be the unanimous opinion of the Bonhommicans, that whether their exquisite sense of taste was natural or acuired, page 261there was scarcely a vestige of the moral sense left among the generality of them, though there were indeed many and great exceptions.

We were to dine next day at Nicophange's who, after he had done his material business, kindly offered to walk with me to view the city. The streets were extremely crouded with people, and one would have thought all the coaches in the universe were assembled in this capital. Seeing Nicophange frequently saluted from them, I took the liberty of asking him what great men they were (hoping he would excuse the curiosity of a stranger). He very civilly desired me to ask any questions I thought proper, as things occurred, while we continued our walk. The first page 262that afterwards saluted him, he told me was a Merchant; No doubt extremely rich, said I. That is very doubtful, replied he; it is very common here, to make the most show when there is the least substance. The next, who made him a low bow from his carriage, he told me, was the Physician whom he employed. No doubt said I, he makes a great deal by his practice, as he keeps his coach. He is, answered he, a very learned, and honest man; but know, that in this vast city, the physicians who have but three or four patients in different parts of the town, cannot possibly attend them on foot; besides, going into houses where perhaps they never were before with their shoes all covered over with dirt, would be very indelicate. The third, he said, was his Taylor: Is page 263there a necessity for his riding in a carriage also, said I? He laughed, and answered no; but that he had the ambition to be employed by the Nomras (grandees), though it probably would be his ruin, as their extravagance often put it out of their power (if they had the inclination) to pay their debts, and it was very difficult to compel them to it. In short, there were Apothecaries, Players, Dancing and Singing masters, Tooth-drawers, and Corn-cutters; and many other still lower trades in other parts of the world, all figuring away in their carriages; so that all ranks and degrees of life seemed to be confounded. While at the same time there were such numbers of beggars pestering every body who walked, that I could page 264not tell what to make of such a medley.

Perhaps, if I had known the capital of my own country a little better, my surprise would not have been so great.

At dinner I was introduced to the acquaintance of a Luxo-voluptan by Nicophange; he was called Bonaris, and from a similarity of character was fond of Bonhommican company. I happened to sit next him at table, and found him very polite and communicative When we broke up from dinner, he said to me, As you are the greatest stranger to the manners and customs of this country, I shall be very happy in giving you any information in my power, and shall be ready to attend you to places of curiosity or amusement; while at the same time I hope page 265you will not refuse me the favour of informing me sometimes of particulars concerning yours. I am, continued he, an idle man; my fortune is independent, and I have no family cares, being unmarried; my time is passed in rational amusements, or literary pursuits, sometimes in town, and sometimes in the country, just as I am in the humour. You see then that my attendance on you, will not break in on any of my more important affairs, and is therefore no kind of compliment, but doing myself a pleasure. I answered him in the same frank manner, and we agreed to go directly to the public walks.

It being a fine evening, there was a great deal of what is called good company. The women in general page 266seemed handsome, but one particularity of theirs drew very much my attention; they appeared to have wings on their heads. Good God! said I, to Bonaris; have the women wings in this country? Those on the womens heads, are of little importance, replied he with a smile, but many of both sexes have others of the greatest consequence, and from a cause which you cannot possibly form any idea of; to add to your wonder, let me inform you, that we were not always thus stigmatized by them, but have had the honour of meriting this distinction, by an unbounded indulgence in voluptuousness. I begged him to explain himself, which he said he would, but first desired me to take notice of the shape of many persons, both men and women. page 267After having considered them with some attention, I told him the only thing particular I observed, was an uncommon fullness about many of their shoulders. That is sufficient, said he, and I shall now proceed to satisfy your curiosity (after having premised, that what I have to say is so very extraordinary, if you should ever have an opportunity of relating it to your countrymen, they would probably suppose this prodigy to be only Immodesty allegorized; but you will soon be convinced of its being strictly true).

Besides the acuteness of our sense of Taste, said he, which you must have heard of, we have also that of Touch or Feeling in as exquisite a degree as human nature is capable of sup-page 268porting, without turning pleasure into pain; especially in the commerce betwixt the sexea^† This however produced no bad effects, whilst our manners continued plain and modest. But about a century ago, when they became very loose, from the bad example of one of our Kings, a very surprising phenomenon made its appearance, the cause of which has never been accounted for in a natural way, by our greatest Philosophers, and must therefore be deemed supernatural. It is most probably meant to expose the vice, by setting a mark upon the guilty; for though they assist them in committing it, that they were given for that purpose, I think page 269cannot be supposed. This phenomenon is a pair of wings sprouting from every woman's shoulders, immediately after a failure in chastity; and from every man's, who has seduced a young maiden, or married woman. As these are repeated, or ^‡ according to the strength of their desires, the wings increase in size, till they become in full proportion to the body; and if the vice is left off from a sincere repentance, they gradually decrease till they entirely vanish. You see both men and women endeavour to hide them under their clothes, but it is in vain, unless they are very small indeed. But they use them with great spirit to carry them to an page 270assignation. Those women who have lost all shame, and wear them publicly, are called Alæ-putas; Women of fashion, often more inexcusable than the others, only Galanteras; and the other sex, by far the most blameable of all, Corrumperos.

As to those on the women's heads, it is only a sign of dissipation, or violent passion for public places; but it is generally observed, that those whose wings on that place are unusually high, soon have them appear on their shoulders, which the men call being fledged. One thing more I must mention, which is, that many Nomrinas (women of quality) though very well provided, are so lazy, as not even to use them to meet their lovers; but have little Cars provided, to which they harness Pigeons, Cuc-page 271kows, Pheasants, or other birds, which they secretly keep for that, purpose. In this they are followed by the Alæ-putas in greatest vogue, by way of giving themselves airs. For generally they are not content with becoming imitators, but give the ton to most parts of female dress; the sex wisely considering, that as it is the sole study of these Nymphs to allure the men, they must be the best judges of what will please them. I have even heard of some men who were guilty of that piece of effeminacy. As they use their wings in some measure at the same time, very slight efforts are necessary from the birds. This phenomenon surprised me more than even the Taupinierans had done, and while he yet spoke, it occurred to me, that a stigma on page 272the guilty person was more just than our notions in Europe, of fixing an ideal pair of horns on the forehead of the poor husband.

When Bonaris had ended, I observed to him, that in my country, Cupid, or the passion of love, was always allegorically represented with wings, that the ardency of an amorous flame was metaphorically called winged in poetry, and a learned Bishop had attempted to invent artificial wings for mankind; but I never expected to meet with a People, where the votaries of love should be equipped with adventitious ones. I had scarcely said these words, when we saw two very fine women coming towards us, with their wings displayed; O the angels, exclaimed I! for they brought page 273pictures of these divine beings into my mind. If they are Angels, replied he laughing, they are fallen ones, and I would advise you to have nothing to say to them, or you may probably repent it. So thought I to myself, then they have got that cursed bane to love, even into this country; but how should it be brought? that subject however took up little of my attention, as my thoughts were so full of the other. Do not these wings, said I, occasion a great many divorces, as they are a sure proof of incontinency? Many jealousies, replied he; but as by our laws they are no proof, and divorces can only be obtained in this country for adultery, it rather enables them to avoid being detected, by making their assignations so much the easier. On observing the heads page 274of the women, and finding them almost all alike; I remarked to my friend, that the females of Mirovolante must in general have a great passion for dissipation, as they all had wings on their heads. There, said he, you are deceived; the case is this. The winged ones being the ton, have made their feathers appear so elegant by their manner of shaping, staining, and dressing them, that they are become so much the fashion; that all other women of any genteel station are obliged to imitate them, and wear false ones.

It now grew dark, and we retired from the walks. In our way to the Merchants quarter, we went through a street where there were great numbers of Alæ-putas taking little short flights, and hopping about page break

Hild Bowman delin^t: et sculp^t: See Page 27

page breakpage 275with design to engage their prey. While I was in serious discourse with my friend on the neglect or connivance of the magistrates, in suffering such nuisances, whereby the temptations of a brothel were brought into the public streets; exposing unwary youth when going about their necessary affairs, to be seduced into vice and disease; especially as Bonaris said, that houses of entertainment were every where open for the reception of these nymphs and their paramours for their money (my idea of angels having now intirely vanished). When suddenly, before I was aware, a tall masculine, Alæputa clasps me in her arms, mounts into the air, and flies with me about fifty paces; then set me down, and run away laughing like to kill herself; page 276as did all that saw it. I own my surprise and fright was very considerable, however when I recovered myself, the ridiculousness of the thing moved my risible faculties also. When my friend joined me, he desired I would feel my pockets, to see if I had lost nothing, which upon examination was luckily found to be the case.

We supped at Morogow's, where they laughed very heartily at my adventure. Before we separated, a party was made to go next evening to one of the theatres, to see a famous actor called Garrimond in one of Avonswan's plays, which were constantly brought here and translated. Bonaris undertook to secure us places (which required considerable interest page 277when that actor appeared); and we appointed to meet at a house of entertainment near the theatre.

We were engaged to dine the next day with the Queen's Ambassador at that court, who was also obliged to conform to the Luxo-voluptan manner of living. He seemed to be a man of superior worth and abilities, and was much esteemed. At table he was very affable and agreeable, and hearing of my adventure, was a good deal diverted. This turned the conversation upon so very extraordinary a particularity with respect to chastity; and many stories were told of jealous husbands, and the means afforded by these wings of escaping detection. It afterwards fell on their page 278manners in general. Their excessive gaming, by which in a few years estates of twenty thousand gorgerines (equal to so many of our guineas) yearly, were often reduced to little or nothing. The vast sums of money thrown away in electing delegates to the lower house of Cortesinas or Parliament, with the great corruption both of the Electors and elected. The great profusion of the public money, in place of the exact œconomy which a state so much in debt required; like a spendthrift heir, who, the more desperate his circumstances become, grows only the more extravagant. Their excessive liberty degenerated into licentiousness. Their parties and factions are carried to such excessive heights, and many other page 279things too tedious to repeat; which in the opinion of the company, were strong symptoms, that if some convulsion did not happen to restore to the Luxo-voluptans their former virtue, that they must soon destroy themselves in anarchy and confusion, or give up their liberties (at least a part of them) to the crown, as the only remedy remaining to prevent their total destruction.

Three or four days after was appointed by the Ambassador, to introduce us at court; and he spoke very highly of Gorgeris the Monarch of this vast Empire, as he did also of her Majesty, his royal consort.

From the Ambassador's, we went to the appointed place for meeting; which had a public room, for the drinking of beverages, like our coffee, page 280orgeat, &c. &c.; and it being too early to go to the Theatre, we amused ourselves with looking over the printed papers of news, which were in prodigious numbers; I counted thirty published that day, and suppose those were not the whole. Moraveres addressing himself to Bonaris, said, he wondered what they could find worth reading to insert every day in these numerous sheets; and what effect they had upon their politics. The other replied, that they easily found means to fill them with one thing or another; politics, scandal, domestic and foreign occurrences are inexhaustible topics; and if they are at a loss, it is easy making a lie; the contradicting of which next day will make another paragraph. As to the effect page 281they have upon our politics, continued he, it is hard to say whether the liberty of the press does more good or harm. For on the one hand, if it deters Ministers from taking measures which may infringe the liberties of the people; on the other, as the plainest propositions may be wrested by an artful writer, to give a very unfair view of it, the people are very often misled by them.

We now took our places in the Theatre; and until the play began, I was very well entertained with examining the house. It was of an immense size (at lead in comparison with that at Ludorow), and having been lately fitted up by a celebrated Architect, was both elegant and magnificent. I was also not a little diverted with the pretty flutterings of page 282the Alæ-putas, who occupied principally some of the upper lodges, and frequently took wing from one side of the house to the other, when they saw a spark they wanted to draw into their snares.

When the curtain was drawn up, and Garrimond entered on the stage, there was a clapping of hands which continued for a minute or two; at last all was attention through the play, except when some sentiment or fine piece of action forced their applause. I had seen that very piece performed at Ludorow, under the direction of the author; and must do Garrimond the justice to own, that he seemed to understand his part perfectly; and though under the disadvantage of a translation, gave a greater force to the page 283character he played, than the actor who performed it at Ludorow. But at the Bonhommican theatre every part was equally well acted, which was far from being the case here; so that (except one or two women) Garrimond appeared like a giant amongst dwarfs. If this actor has great merit, he has been also very fortunate to appear in a country where amusements are so much the fashion, and so highly valued. By what I was informed, he has made ten times more money by acting Avonswan's plays, than ever the author did by writing them; and to such a degree of frenzy has their admiration of him arose, that had he a rival of equal merit, I make no doubt but the scene of the famous pantomimes page 284of degenerated Rome would be renewed, and the nobility would take party, wear their liveries, and follow their triumphal cars.

We made up proper clothes to make our appearance in at court, and were introduced one after another to their Majesties, who received us very graciously, and we had the honour of kissing their hands. When it came to my turn to be presented to the King, his Excellency the Ambassador said, I was a native of a country on the other side the globe, who by a fatal accident had been left by the ship I came in; which had been sent out with another by our King to make discoveries in the southern hemisphere, and in a particular manner whether or not there was a great page 285continent on that side of the globe. That I had made my way to Bonhommica through many dangers and adventures, where his Queen had been pleased to take me into her service.

His Luxo-voluptan Majesty heard him with great attention, and afterwards talked to me above a quarter of an hour; asking very pertinent questions concerning my country and its sovereign. His Majesty said, he highly honoured the King of Great Britain for his liberality of sentiment, in fitting out ships for the discovery of unknown countries. That if ever I got home, I might assure his Majesty, if any ships belonging to his subjects should visit the Luxo-voluptan ports, they might depend on the page 286usage which the nations most favoured, and in greatest friendship with his subjects received.

It was soon buzzed about in the apartments, that I was of a nation on the other side of the world, when immediately a great curiosity was raised concerning me. I heard them say to one another, what is he like? Is he a rational creature? Let us go see him. When they found I was no monster, and could speak their language tolerably, I had soon a great circle round me of Nomras and Nomrinas, Comras and Comrinas (Gentlemen and Ladies), and even some Nomrihas and Nomrihinas (Dukes and Dutchesses), who asked me a thousand impertinent questions. I answered them as well as I could, page 287and was glad when it was over; but this produced me many invitations to dinners and suppers, from the principal nobility; some of which I accepted, that an opportunity of learning something of their manners and customs might not be lost.

The first Luxo-voluptan I dined with, was a Nomra in a great post in administration. I need not say every thing was in the greatest grandeur and elegance. Some of the Nomrinas and Comrinas at table, seemed by their shoulders to be of the order of Gallanteras; but they were not the less censorious for that reason, perhaps on the contrary the more so, to hide their own blemishes. Several anecdotes from the scandalous chronicle were mentioned by page 288them, and one in particular which had happened two evenings before. A certain Nomrihina, whose Nomriha was so excessively jealous, that he had clipped her wings, and confined her to his house. This made her meeting with her noble Corrumpero extremely difficult, But what, said the Gallantera, cannot all-powerful love atchieve? her wings growing very fast, she sometimes conversed with him on the top of her own house, but more generally he was let in at a garret window by her maid, the confidante. But that evening the Nomriha her husband got intelligence of their being together in the maid's chamber, and was so near surprising them, that the Corrumpero was obliged to fly out at the window in his shirt, and has got such a cold that he keeps his page 289bed, which has thrown the poor Nomrihina into immoderate affliction. Commend me, said another Gallantera, to the Faramondian manners, where though every husband has cause, none are jealous; it is not the fashion. And a most excellent fashion it is, rejoined a third; why should people, when they are tired of one another, pique themselves on a ridiculous constancy? No, continued she, give and take liberties on both sides, say I; it is the pleasure of life, and saves a great deal of uneasiness and ill humour, about a very trifling affair. I took the liberty of observing to that lady, that it must be a difficult thing in that country for people to know their fathers. Is it not so every where? replied she smartly; but of page 290what consequence is that? they know their mothers, and that is sufficient. Pray Madam, rejoined I, do the Burghers in that country also follow the fashion? The Burghers, exclaimed she! No, if it descended to them it would be enough to make people of quality almost leave it off. The conversation afterwards changed to politics, and they talked much of the monstrous ingratitude of the Armoserians, a large colony of theirs at a thousand leagues distance, who had revolted. A Nomra said, that after having nursed them up to maturity at so great an expence, and entered into a war solely on their account, by which the nation had incurred an additional debt of above sixty millions; how unreasonable it was to expect, that the mother country page 291should continue to bear all the burden, when they were become so able to take a share of it. Besides, continued he, it would absolutely have been the ruin of the kingdom, by depopulating it; for who, but people of large property, would continue to live in this country, where every thing is taxed so high, when by going to Armoseria, they could enjoy a finer climate, and live at a quarter the expence, without reckoning the great advantages of making a fortune in a country not the twentieth part peopled? The great emigrations which took place since the end of last war, plainly evince this. Another Nomra rejoined, that if a certain tax which was laid on, had not been repealed by a former page 292administration, (the members of which were now violent in opposition), it would have executed itself, and we should have had no rebellion. But the Armoserians by that weakness were spirited up to oppose every tax that should be laid on them; thinking that non-importation would make such a clamour among the Merchants, as to frighten the Ministry. A Comra of the lower house of Cortesinas was of opinion that the error lay deeper, even in the very original Charters of the Colonies, which by giving them a constitution similar to that of the mother country, made them imagine they did not depend on the Cortesinas, but only on the King. The posterity of a set of determined rupublicans, said he, should have been page 293held in with a tighter rein; especially when they were yearly reinforced with such a virtuous set of recruits from every jail in the kingdom: some of whose descendants, for any thing we know, may be now leading-men in the congress. Opinions on this affair were perfectly unanimous in this company.

The next I dined with was also a Nomra, but who had been turned out of a great office. Here the sentiments were diametrically opposite to the former company, concerning the Armoserians; and they all agreed that they were the most oppressed and ill-used people under the sun. What! the Cortesinas to tax a people contrary to their inclinations, who are not represented! was ever any page 294thing heard of so unconstitutional? What signifies your having nursed, and defended them, at the expence of sixty millions of gorgerines, till they are grown powerful enough to go to war with you; if you will now take their money from them without their consent? Surely the mother country gets enough by her exclusive trade with them, said they (which is now the only one she can depend on), without thinking of taxing her own children.

An evening or two after, I was at the house of one of our worthy Merchants, with a set of Bonhommicans and Bonaris. In the course of the conversation, I happened to mention the very different sentiments I had heard concerning the Armoserian page 295rebellion; when the whole company joined with me in desiring Bonaris to explain that matter to us. It needs no other, replied he, than, that the one is out of place, and the other is in. What, exclaimed a Bonhommican! does that alter the nature of the thing? Entirely, said the other; for if they were to change situations (which may possibly soon be the case), they would immediately change their opinions and manner of speaking, both in public and private. Good God! cried another; can men have the impudence to act in such a barefaced manner? Very easily, returned Bonaris, we see it every day; they find out subterfuges and equivocations; and at the worst, if one has been in an error, is he always to persist in it? But, said a third, are not page 296they despised by every body?——Only by the party they have quitted,—— the other receives them with open arms. If a man indeed pretends to stand neuter, continued Bonaris, upon motives of conscience, he is shunned and despised by both. What is very extraordinary, there are many honest men among them (of both parties), in the common intercourses of life; but they get so heated by their disputes, that one would think they actually forgot the difference betwixt right and wrong. In this affair of the Armoserians, continued he, I own the opposition carried things a little too far; for by their speeches in the Cortesinas, printed pamphlets, and writings in the news-papers (there being some great names amongst them), the rebels were spirited up, page 297by thinking they had their approbation, and expecting a diversion made at home in their favour. By this means they have probably been led by degrees to carry things farther than they at first intended, and at last to the greatest extremities, which will ruin millions of these people, and cost this country much blood and immense treasure. Too far, cried they with one voice! why were not they punished?——They generally took care to keep clear of the laws against high treason, which are very favourable in this country; and where some words might be construed as such, the government thought proper to overlook them, for fear of raising disturbances. Thought I to myself, a little of Queen Tudorina's govern-page 298ment would do this Nation no harm, no more than Old England.

I dined another day with a Nomra who did not seem much involved in politics, and happening to stay after every other person was gone, he offered to carry me with him to his club. I asked him, what kind of meeting it was? O! says he, you shall go and see a little of our manners, though we are a select body, and none can be admitted without being ballotted for; yet such a stranger as you are, there can be no objection to! You must know, says he, that clubs are kept among the men of all degrees in this Metropolis, it is the general custom; but there are about a score called so by way of page 299eminence, which are only composed of the Nomras and Comras of distinction. And how do you employ yourselves there, rejoined I? We eat and drink in the most elegant manner at a small expence, returned he, it not costing us above two gorgerines a head for dinner or supper; then we sport our money pretty freely at different games. We are very numerous, continued he, and we are consequently sure of always finding company whenever we have an inclination to go. But, rejoined I, do not some of you get devilish tumbles sometimes? O yes, answered he, we are all in debt, but the Nation owes two hundred millions, so it is the fashion you see. Give me leave to ask you only one question more, said I: How do your wives dispose of page 300themselves while you are at your clubs? O, the best way they can, replied he, we do not trouble ourselves about that. There has indeed been an attempt made to establish one where both sexes are admitted, but it does not take, it is unnatural.

We found between forty and fifty people in a large handsome room, well illuminated, amusing themselves at different games of cards and dice. They were all men of fortune and fashion, of the upper or lower house of Cortesinas, and many of them in high offices; but all had the same passion for sporting their money; that is to say, were not contented with what they had, and wishing to increase it at the expence of another. Those who were not much engaged, page 301sat down to a very elegant supper at midnight. After that, things went on with more spirit, the company gradually increasing. I shall not pretend to describe this scene, great sums were won and lost, and the floor was entirely covered with cards; but in the height of it, a small accident discomposed them a little for a short time.

Whilst two Nomras were playing at a game, something rcsembling Picquet, one of them was suddenly attacked with an apoplectic fit; he was immediately removed into another room by the waiters, and proper medical assistance sent for. But before he went, the Nomra who had played with him desired the company to take notice (in case of his antago-page 302nist's recovery), that he had the game in his hand. Towards morning they gradually dropped off, and returned home, jaded with want of rest; the losers in all the horrors of despair and vexation, and the winners enjoying not half the satisfaction which might be imagined. The place of a principal waiter at one of these clubs, is more lucrative than a good post under government; for besides the profuse gratuities they receive for their attendance, they are bankers to the winners, and usurious lenders to the losers, becoming so opulent, that they are sometimes elected into the lower house of Cortesinas; where they are caressed by, and sit on the same bench with those, behind whose chairs they formerly stood. When I considered the manner of life these page 303Luxo-voluptans constantly led, I was not surprised that the women's wings grew, and flourished exceedingly.

The women not being less curious than the men to learn the manners, customs, and virtues of the English, I was also much caressed by them, and carried to some assemblies where none but select company were admitted. There I could see that play was equally their passion as that of the other sex, though it did not run near so high; a gorgerine a fish, at a game resembling our quadrille and high stakes at another, like our loo, sufficiently agitated at times their beautiful features. All back feathers were carefully concealed at these meetings, as well as at routes, which the women frequently gave at their page 304own houses. In these last, it seemed to be their great ambition, to make them as disagreeable to themselves and the company as they possibly could, by crouding their apartments as full as they could hold.

But though back feathers were concealed, some of the head wings were enormous. I asked a Comrina, whom I had the honour to be known to (at one of the latter places); how she proposed spending her evening. She replied, that after dining at the Nomra such a one's, they had gone to the play, from the play here; from hence to two more routes, from thence to rondelleva, from rondelleva to fairy-hall where they sup, and from thence home. At what time may the last happen? resumed I,—it page 305was impossible to say exactly; perhaps between five and six, returned she.

Having already mentioned my being fond of music, and even a performer, it will be expected that the concerts and operas were not wholly neglected by me. The best voices and performers on instruments there, as well as in London, are foreigners. The music is very much in the Italian taste, and they have many great composers; but whether they or the Italians ought to be preferred, I shall not take upon me to determine.

The entertainment however which surprised and diverted us most, was a masked ball given at the Theopan, a large rotunda lately built in a beautiful stile of architecture. We were told there would not be another page 306while we stayed at Miro-volante, and as none of the other commanders nor myself had ever seen one, we made a party of which Bonaris was one and went to it in Ma gelores, a dress resembling what they call Dominos in the shops of Tavistock-Street. As this ball was open to every one for their money, all the different species of human flyers were in great plenty, and made at least four-fifths of the whole company; there the Galanteras and Corrumperos (as their faces were concealed) gave themselves no trouble to hide their wings, however easily it might have been done from their smallness. It was very ridiculous to observe the different growths of them, upon the shoulders of tall men and women. Some were only of a size for Genii or page 307Cupids, and they increased gradually to that of Angels or Devils. The greatest number were of the last, and it was only those which could support the body in a flight of any extent. They were of all colours, and many of them kept in excellent order; but I was sorry to see a great many hoary ones, which looked as if they would preserve them to their last breath. It was not easy to discern the difference of sexes, but by what we could judge, the females were greatly the majority. They were all dressed in imitation of different birds, with proper masks resembling their heads, and very well imitated.

Think how laughable a scene it must have been, to see such a number of tame birds (though often of page 308the resemblance of wild ones) flying, hopping, chattering and squeaking about the room. Some of the Alæputas would fly up to the top of the dome, and skim round it, exposing a little too much their lower parts; but I must do them the justice to say that they all wore drawers. A few of the Gallanteras and their imitators brought their carrs and equipage with them in their chairs, in which they also flew about in a more decent manner, to the great entertainment of the company. To describe the outrages done to nature, in that strange group of feathered rationals, would be endless. Hawks gallanting hen pheasants, vultures turkey hens, and eagles pea-hens. Crows arm in arm with white pigeons, screech owls with nightingales, and ravens page 309with Chinese pheasants But what diverted us more particularly after supper and the wine had gone freely about, was, to see a mild turtle-dove cuffing a goss hawk very smartly round the room. They at last became a little too riotous, and we left them before four o'clock.

Our evening's diversion had like to have had melancholy consequences. The worthy Moraveres our Quadorow, was taken ill of a fever two days after; whether occasioned by catching cold, the hurry and croud of the place, or from what other cause, it was impossible to say. We were alarmed for him, and proposed calling in a physician, which he for some time opposed, hoping it would go off; but finding it did not, he at last page 310consented.The question now was, which one to send for. Morrogow and Nicophange proposed Nicopheris, the one they employed for ordinary in their families, and had reason to be satisfied with. The other commanders and myself were for one of greater note and more extensive practice. The matter was referred to Bonaris, our oracle in most things, who said, that in the practice of physic in Miro-volante, there was a distinction to be made, between the art and the science. That the art consisted in being well with as many apothecaries as possible, by prescribing great quantities of superfluous medicines for their benefit; in setting themselves off to the best advantage, especially with the women; in recounting remarkable cures performed page 311by themselves, no matter though not entirely consistent with truth; in shewing a very particular concern for, and attention to their patients disorder. In visiting at uncommon hours, continued Bonaris, from their great anxiety and care, and giving very minute directions to nurses, as if the least particular was of consequence, chusing always to have them of their own recommendation, as it, was their interest to speak well of them. I am very sensible (still continued he), that some of the physicians in high reputation have acquired it meerly by their merit; but there are also a great number who have pushed themselves by arts like the above mentioned; such arts are not practised by Nicopheris, he is above them; but he is a very learned page 312and knowing physician, and in my opinion Moraveres cannot be in better hands. He was accordingly sent for, and we had no reason to repent of it. In a few days our friend by his care was out of danger; and soon recovered entirely, to the great satisfaction of us all.

While Moraveres was in danger, we seldom stirred abroad; and Bonaris frequently calling in upon us, I had a great deal of conversation with him upon the kingdom of Luxovolupto, and their neighbours on that continent. The southern continent, he said consisted of several powerful kingdoms, two or whom, Castillaria and Faramondia; had, at different periods, aimed at universal Monarchy; but both had failed from the page 313other nations uniting against them. In which alliances, the Luxo-voluptans had acted a very distinguished part, especially in the last against Faramondia; who being their nearest neighbour, had of consequence always been their natural enemy. In this vigorous exertion (he continued), they fell into the pernicious custom of borrowing money on the national faith; which, by degrees, had involved them in an enormous debt, with little probability of its ever being paid off. The other great kingdoms, he said, had all lost their liberty; the Luxo-voluptans alone having preserved theirs (after many struggles with their Monarchs), by their virtue, and love of freedom. That after the last great exertion in behalf of it, the page 314boundary was fixed between the prerogative of the crown, and the rights of the people; since which time, no nation was ever happier, or at least had more just cause to be so. But trade and manufactures having brought immence wealth into the country, luxury followed fast on their steps; whose strides have been much lengthened by the conquest of a rich and manufacturing country at eight thousand leagues distance, by a company of Merchants. The servants of that company (still continued he), have been guilty of such rapacity on the natives, as shocks humanity to think of; and come home with immense fortunes, which, as they got them so easily, they spend wantonly.

Our immense colonies are grown also extremely rich and powerful. A war which was entered into entirely on their account, terminated, as was generally thought, gloriously; by having a large country which lay behind them ceded to us. But now they were freed from their only enemy, they soon shewed their refractory spirit, and at length broke out into an open rebellion; are now carrying on war against their mother-country; and how that will terminate, there is yet no making any judgment. Wealth is become the only object which all men aim at to support that luxury, and all crimes of course are perpetrated to attain it. That spirit of liberty which still remains said Bonaris, has degenerated into licentiousness; especially in that quarter page 316of Miro-volante called the City; where valuing themselves on their riches, they make a point of opposing the court on all occasions; and become the dupes of every adventurer, who puts on the mask of Patriotism to deceive them.

It is, continued he, happy for us, that Faramondia is very near in as much debt, and as luxurious as ourselves, without having so good credit to borrow; otherwise we should not be long at peace with them. The above was the substance of what I learned from him in several conversations, and in the last, he gave a general character of that people in few words, but which, he said, must be understood with great allowances.

That the Nomras and Comras run out their fortunes without preserving their dignity. That the Nomrinas and Comrinas had almost given up all pretensions to chastity. That Religion and Morality had lost their influence on all ranks of people. And that a universal profligacy pervaded the whole.

Moraveres was now perfectly recovered from his illness; when a great mob paraded through the city, ordering every body to put out lights in their windows, in honour of the election of Wilkiferis, a great favourite of theirs, to an office of the greatest trust and profit in the city. I am extremely glad of it, cried out Bonaris. Who is he, said Moraveres? A very clever profligate, replied the page 318other, who has known how to dupe these wiseacres for some years past, and they have now put it in his power to do it effectually. While we were talking, an inferior Bonhommican officer came hastily into the room, and acquainted the Quadarow, that the mob had fallen upon, and were abusing many of their seamen, who happened to be on shore. We all went out immediately, and I heard some of the mob saying one to another, "Damn these foreigners, what business have they here"? they pretend to be virtuous; damn their virtue, will it bring them any thing? will it make the pot boil?

The Quadarow was obliged to apply to the chief magistrate, who got together a number of constables, page 319and rescued them. They were all ordered on board immediately, and few for the future were suffered to come into the city.