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Salient. An Organ of Student Opinion at Victoria University College, Wellington N.Z. Vol. 21, No. 4. April 23, 1958

The Wooden Spoon Again — A Tragedy in Five Acts

The Wooden Spoon Again

A Tragedy in Five Acts

This year Miss Victoria has repeated her consistently dismal Easter performance; in fact we have notched up but one win in fifty-eight tournaments. The tabulated results and the individual sports reports tell their own story—a story for the iron-hearted only.

How badly did we do? (This paragraph is for non-table-readers only). The gloom is brilliantly relieved when cricket is considered—congratulations to Jim Zohrab and his minions on a good win—but gathers darkly over the rest of the picture. Excluding C.A.C. (Lincoln to you) who don't field a full team and consequently are not eligible for the Wooden Spoon, we scored a second in Rowing and tailed the field in Athletics, Basketball, Shooting, Tennis, and Swimming. In the unofficial events Victoria was second in the Drinking Horn (where were you, Kent?), second equal in the Law Moots, and last again in Yachting. Our congratulations to the winners of N.Z.U. Blues. There were: F. Crotty (Rowing), R. Irwin (Athletics), P. Preston-Thomas (Rowing), M. Winter (Rowing), R. Binning (Fencing from Winter Tournament). Cricket Blues are yet to be announced. Vic. men won two Drinking Blues also, but we were unable to discover their names by ordinary interrogatory means.

Let's face it. The plain fact of the matter is that we can't play basketball, or swimming, or even tennis, and we haven't been able to do all three together for a considerable time. Worse, our prospects seem to be as murky as our record. It is not easy to say why Vic. is so weak at most Easter sports. Do we lack facilities? or zeal? or tradition? or a Student Union building? or organization? or all of these? Our winter performances are in general very much better. But the morose conclusion forced upon us is that apart from cricket, and perhaps rowing, we just cannot (or did not) field a team of anything like the required standard. Having Massey to help us increases our shame, but is obviously not being effective in results.

The only constructive suggestion it seems possible to offer is that members of the appropriate sporting clubs get (i) 100% more Tournament conscious. We should hear of nothing in the caf. but better jumps, better swims, tricky new combinations, etc., for three weeks or so before the event; we should make more of team membership, and Tournament in general should loom large in our consciousness. As things are, one could easily complete a degree at Victoria without ever learning that Tournaments are hold. Clubs should also get (ii) organized and into training at the soonest possible moment. Even that is too late; what needs doing is the impossible—perhaps a squad of "possible" meeting before the term begins.

"Salient", following a tradition longer than my memory, has repeated the annual What-a-good-team-we've-got-at-last-hooray-success-is-ours forecast, and is now obliged to make the Oh-well-the-other-teams-were-stronger-than-we-thought-or-we-didn't-live-up-to-ex-pectations-which-is-a-pity apology cum excuse which the result chart requires. This is a foolish procedure, and I hope future editors writing of future Tournaments will be more restrained in their expectations (and of course more jubilant in their report).

The N.Z.U.S.A. Council and the N.Z.U.S. Press Council met in Christchurch during Tournament, and from all appearances enjoyed successful, if lengthy sessions. We record our pleasure at the election of two Victoria men, Bernie Galvin and Con Bollinger, to the presidencies of these respective bodies.

It is a hard matter to decide just how important sporting success is at a sporting tournament like this, and doubtless one's view is jaundiced by our outstanding lack of it; but this reporter failed to find a single Vic. representative (including himself) whose weekend was in any way spoiled by it, and the gusto and success (every bit up to OU's) with which our people talked, drank, laughed, danced, sang, and walked home along the river, made winning daylight performances almost irrelevant. Anyway, the colour of an athlete's singlet should not detract from the spectators' enjoyment in watching a fine performance, so when not actually competing the team should have enjoyed the days also.

The Tournament, per se, was an unqualified success. The weather was good, the organisation was good, and students met each other in sport, conference, and socially, in a way that fulfilled the Tournament's proper function to an eminently satisfactory degree. Tournaments are, in the opinion of this reporter, a Good Thing, so let us continue to take part in them with enthusiasm, spirit, and be it hoped, a success on the field to equal that achieved in the non-competitive sphere.

Finally, "Salient" wishes to emphatically deny the rumour that at the next N.Z.U.S.A. meeting the Constitution is being amended to read . . . "and VUW shall be holders of the Wooden Spoon".