Anecdote

Photo: Robert W. Joiner

Geoff Richards

All this actually happened in our own university! A certain Mr A, a thin, raincoated figure whose body bent forward slightly as he walked and who always and without cease smiled, entered one day a certain lavatory in the library. The demand for this facility on the part of students was such, that combined resources of observation made the conclusion inevitable, that the facility was occupied without cease, and this was deemed unreasonable. Discreet investigation led Mr A to answer with the greatest shame, "I'm dying." Mr A's white complexion and ghostly, almost heavenly, smile contributing to this excuse some plausibility, the matter was, despite the fact that Mr A did not actually die, passed over without a word.

As the library is peopled by people who, since they are very studious, are often coming and going, in order to attend lectures and so forth, nobody was, since he had either just come or just gone, in a position to notice one student who neither came nor went, but sat at a table for a long time without moving. It was none other than Mr A. But eventually he was noticed, thanks to an odour so objectionable, as to make all the students around sure that they were not the cause of it. Mr A being approached, an explanation was demanded. This time he made no answer; nor in fact even a move, until when prodded his decomposing body collapsed on to the floor This time Mr A was not forgiven, and everyone talked about the disgusting incident for ages afterwards, which is how I came by the story.