Capricorn.

People will generally take advantage of you. Beware of contracting venereal disease or Diahorrea.

You will receive a birthday card from Jack Marshall as there is a high chance your birthday will occur between the 11th and 17th of May.

You have a high affinity for certain species of Himalayan bears tomorrow. Keep away from bears. Better still keep away from the Himalayas. Alternatively, wear a bear suit tomorrow.

Gemini.

A good time for lighting firecrackers. Your hopes are pinned on skyrockets which should pay good dividends. Above all, avoid tom thumb's at all costs. By the way, you will inherit a ferris whell from your little sister who will be committed to an asylum.

Take an interest in fatty tales and frogs, since you will get married sometime next week. Take life casually and relax frequently with your dog. Be wary of crooked few-[unclear: elters.] Better still graduate as a Physio-therapist tomorrow.

Pisces.

A tricky time awaits you. Exercise your normal good judgement when playing the harpschichord.

You will lose $10,000 in a Monaco casino on the 11th of May, but all will not be lost. Prince Rainier will turn you into a prince/princess with a single kiss — your reward for contributing the $500,000th to the royal coffers.

Gyro Gearloose invents a pleasure machine for you tomorrow. Accept with reservations and enthusiasm.

Aries.

Your pad will be raided by the Drug Squad at midday tomorrow. Don't worry, your pot has already been stolen by your father but, you will be arrested for running a house of prostitution.

Of course your innocent, but as your stars indicate a lengthly but pleasurable stay in prison, you will be indicted. If you're a guy, don't take along your vaseline. If you'r a girt, make sure the prison is stilt lit by [unclear: candlepower].

Tomorrow you will fall in love.

Scorpio.

If you're a woman you should expect some surprises. If the boy in your life is ambitious, he'll have a good opportunity put his way before the next issue of Salient. Go along with his plans — something unusual may not please you to begin with, but you will end up enjoying yourself.

If you're a guy, there is some chance you will be assassinated by the Vice-Chancellor. Carry your dog with you at all times or shoot him first.

A good time for kite-flying tomorrow.

Taurus.

Your long lost sailor uncle returns to the family circle. Avoid him at all costs and run away to sea. Alternatively, join the Labour Party, as your prospects of gaining a parliamentary seat are quite high.

If planning suicide, your best hope of not succeeding is on the 22nd of May. Your best bet is to purchase a cockatoo or play plenty of cricket.

You will be discovered by an aristocrat frog tomorrow who, with one kiss, will turn you into a prince/princess.

Leo.

A good time for eating eggs is assured. Travel widely to poultry farms throughout your state. A few pleasant surprises are assured at each stop, especially in sampling new flavours.

Become active in your support for greater protective tarriffs for the poultry industry. This will benefit you in the long run.

You will achieve success when your short story on the New Zealand egg industry is published by "Izvestia".

Beware of the Police. — Go and live in a republic untill May 10th.

Cancer.

Gasoline prices and availability will be excellent. Take the opportunity to stockpile on Molotov Cocktails. If you've made 30,000 by the next issue of Salient, there is a high probability of a trip to Ireland. Be prepared to make money and sleep with Bernadette Devlin.

Tomorrow you stumble on an undiscovered coital technique. Be sure your partner is a Doctor or a Red Cross Nurse, Alternatively, head for the nearest sheep station. May 3rd is a good time to become a wool classer.

Libra.

This will be the happiest time of your life. You will be sent down from Uni. and be unable to gain work. Take the opportunity to do a spot of fishing on the Mediterranean.

Your horoscope is good for fishing and you will certainly catch at least a 10,000 pounder.

Be sure to watch today's midday movie. Stock up on Beer and vaginal deoderant. If it's gone midday already, read the rest of Salient., and demonstrate against the Vice Chancellor.

Eat 7 sausages tomorrow and 1 egg.

Saggitarius.

You will lead a successful Coup D'Etat in Patagonia on May 10th. Be sure to spread copies of Salient to the [unclear: p] peasants before the 5th of May. If you fly a kite from the roof of Parliament House, your chances of desposing U Thant as Secretary General to the United Nations are greatly enhanced.

You will figure prominently today in a scandal that will bring down the National Government. Be sure to eat plenty of sandcrabs and avoid listening to Buddy Holly records.

Virgo.

A

A promising time for subversive activities. If you are a fresher, S.C.M. will make approaches. Maintain your normal flippant manner and enlist. If you are a later-year student, join the N.C.C. Your subversive activities will be fruitful if you wear a smile. Obtain the correct size.

You will assassinate Jack Marshall on May 31st at 6p.m. with a sharp 5c piece.

Grow a bear quickly and steal your little sister's etchings. If you're a guy, these will be handy in other ways.

Aquarius.

The next fortnight will be lousy — except for the 7th of May. If you're a Catholic, he Chi Minh will appear to you in a vision. Offer him some Benson & Hedges, as North Vietnamese cigarettes are terrible.

Be sure to have your camera on hand. Your light meter will not work.

If you're a woman, you will invariably fall pregnant two days later. The future appears lousy, but tread carefully. Avoid the Phantom at all costs.