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'Not Tonight, Josephine'

"Napoleon Bisexual Emperor:

by Frank Richardson. Published by William Kimber. London. $9.55. Reviewed by David Hedge.

General Richardson is a dedicated but un-persuasive proponent of the Freudian theory of history where every public figure suffer memories of an unhappy childhood, filled with Oedipus complexes and domineering schoolmasters. Thus Napoleon is defined phallic-narcissiatic personality, [which is a type associated with great energy but also with passive tendencies, and an unconscious desire for revenge against the opposite sex), and we are told that such a character may becomes a creative genius, of a large-scale criminal depending upon the social stmosphere in which he is brought up. Having given his bash premise, Richardson proceeds to hunt for information to support it. Bonaparte was the second child in a family ruled by a domineering mother, a situation claimed to produce domineering personalities and homosexuals that order, he was educated at an all girls school for several years and then whisked off to a military academy where he enjoyed only the company of men, he was a Corsican surrounded by Frenchmen and so on.

The most obvious source of inferiority feeling on reaching adulthood was his short-ness, compensation for this supposedly being the chief spur to his ambition his ambition. But more first hand reports reveal that his smallness in stature was surpassed by the smallness of his balls which by all accounts were miniscule according to Adler, the passession of inferior organs of any sort leads to a deeply felt sense of inferiority and in the case of a boy, to the development of feminine trails and impotence. The author then hunts with some success for evidence of Napoleon's impotence. Several children, including one by his second wife Marie-Louise, are attributed to him but all are suspect with equal odds going to visiting Counts and ambitious valets as the case may be. He had distincty no success with his first wife, Josephine, who he fucked on and off for about six years with no result, though she had children both before and after her marriage to him. In fact she is said to have commented that. "He's no use at all — its just like so much piss".

Napoleon's feminine trails are best described in a remark that he made to Anyony marchi: "See, doctor, what loved) arms, what smooth white skin without a single hair!

Breast plump and rounded — any beauty would be proud of a bosom like mine. And my hand — how many amongst the fairer sex would be jealous of it." Or as De Segur, a companion of the Russian campaign put it: "When he wanted to seduce his manner was one of ineffable charm, a kind of magnetic power. The person he wished to attract seems to become beside himself. In these moments of sublime power he no longer commands tike a man but seduces like woman."

His first marriage was to Josephine, an experienced prostitute, and the mistree of a superior officer who rewarded him with the command of the Army of Italy for taking her off his hands. The marriage ended in divorce after she had still not had a child in six years. He did note approach his second marriage in the same way. He was giving up his chosen partner and all he wanted was a womb, he said, women should be treated as machines for making children, finally in chose Marie-Louise the daughter of the Emperor of Austria, the marriage being described as the sacrifice of a virgin to the minotaur. She had been brought up in an incredibly sheltered environment, where even her pets had to be females, and was grudgingly forced into the marriage by her father for polititcal reasons. As the bride approached her new kingdom, Napoleon surprised her stopping her coach in the rain and diverting her to a nearby town, where he swiftly got on with the job in hand.

Marie promptly changed her mind about the whole affair and wrote to her father, praising his judgement.

One of his mure famous mistresses was Mae Walewska who only succumbed to him when he threatened to Crush her native Poland graphically grinding his watch with his heel as he spoke. She fainted at the sight and Napoleon, scoring the opportunity, fucked her on the spot. From thenceforth her heart was won.

Richardson also attempts to go into Napoleon's relationship with men, the most documented of which was his infatution with Alexunder 1st of Russia. The two Emperors gave one another the greatest marks of affection. They passed many hours together in the charm of perfect intimacy, and the most familiar relations of private life. During a play, when antor declaimed, "The friendship of a great man is a blessing of the Gods," Alexander rose Hidden!) and kissed Napoleon.

He also possessed a fetish for pulling hair and the ears of his men till they bled, which came to be regarded quite an honour to the Victim, We are also told that Napoleon masturbated to relieve tension before important battles and that when he had trouble pissing (or passing water as the author calls it), which was frequently be would stand for long periods With his forehead pressed against a wall or the brecah of a gun.

Thus the book rambles on in a lone reminiscent of Ripley's Believe it or not with little to commend it except as a study of the author's character apart from his obvious distaste for homosexuals he regards Napoleon's campaigns with a militaristic glee and discuss ofhistory" that would supposed!) have been lost if Napoleon had had a perfect!) normal mate body. The saving grace of the book would have been a large dose of pornography but all the Emperor's exploits are prescnted in a euphemistic fashion. Napoleon takes a maidenhead here, and become intimate with a visiting statesman there but there is little detail and the one point of the book is lost. Most of the information is culled from other similar books and Richardson's own opinions are decidedly vague.