Chapter XXXIX.

There is not the shadow of a doubt that our Dunedin season would have been most profitable if Our Agent had only been content with reasonable robbery, and Our Basso had not conceived the brilliant but ruinous idea of extending our stay to a period of two months—of changing our simple programmes to difficult and presumptuous ones, and engaging local talent to help us out. As it was, we were bankrupt at the end of six weeks, and deeply in debt besides. We had achieved popularity, made many friends, enjoyed thoroughly the bracing climate and the daily contemplation of some of the loveliest scenery in this southern hemisphere; and that was about all the good we had done.

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Dunedin will always live in my heart as the Queen City of New Zealand. The picturesque fashion in which it has spread itself over the hills, its handsome buildings and graceful, artistic tall-spired churches; its tiny bay nestling in the hills, like a turquoise gem in an emerald and greenstone setting; its vividly bright aspect in fair weather, and its melancholy grey soft tints in the season of rain, when the clouds brood mournfully over the gloomy hills; its lovely native bush and feathery forms; its small, clear, babbling, sweetly named Water of Leith; its hills and valleys, and its pretty waterfall, so prettily described in one of Thomas Bracken's best poems—

'Ferns of every shade,
Broider'd and scollop'd 'yond the power of art,
In tens of thousands deck the rocky walls
That hold the mountains back against the sky,
And give the fluent stream an open course
To bring its sweetness to the lands below.
And now, with admiration, I behold
A shower of molten silver falling down
An em'rald moss-clad precipice of rock
That stands a buttress to the central steep
Where range links range in strong volcanic chain,
Forged in the olden times; and, as I gaze
Up through the argent spray-mist and the leaves,
My spirit listens to the cascade's song.'

Altogether Dunedin is a rare, fair spot to tarry in. But we tarried too long—so long that getting away at all became problematical; getting away creditably an impossibility.

The new members of Our Show, who had been engaged on salary terms, became daily more anxious to know when the 'ghost would walk.' Printers and landlords presented their little bills with painful pertinacity. We had paid away all our cash in incidental expenses, and there we were. But when trouble loomed darkest about our professional path, then did the luminous gifts of resource possessed by Our Basso and Our Tenor shine out ever with greatest refulgence.

Their scheme this time was to borrow sufficient money to send Our Agent on to advertise us in Oamaru; to convey all our baggage by degrees and in an innocent manner from the hotel page 258to the theatre; thence to get it aboard the steamer, and arrange our last performance for the same night as the steamer's departure; to keep the whole plan strictly secret, and quit at the fall of the curtain upon our last act. By the time our creditors awoke to the fact, we should be well out of reach at sea.

We managed to get Our Agent off without much difficulty, but the other part of our scheme leaked out somehow; and on the last night, before the curtain fell, about forty creditors thronged behind the scenes. By sheer force we restrained one man from rushing on Our Basso in the final scene on the stage. The excitement was extreme. We all turned our empty pockets inside out, and offered to enter into solemn contracts to send defrayment of our liabilities from other ports. One landlord said he would 'have his value out in blood,' there on the spot, but Our Pianist fainted heavily against him just as he was taking off his coat, and that settled him. At this juncture the steward of the steamer came in to say that the tide served, and we must get aboard if we meant going. Our detainers shouted their intention of taking good care we did not go; and the steward rushed off to consult the captain. That captain was a princely fellow, albeit having a keen eye for business. He returned with the steward, demanded of our creditors 'what they would square for?' offered them half the amount they named, paid it on their acceptance, and took all our signatures to an order entitling him to the entire receipts of our first house in Oamaru. It was all concluded in about five minutes, and we were at liberty to go.

On the road to the steamer at the Rattray Street pier, we passed a coffee-stand, and the pleasant fragrance from the steaming cans made us suddenly thirsty and hungry. Our Basso stopped and invited us to supper, and we, firmly believing that he had a private fund, cheerfully accepted The ladies went on, and Philip Tempest went with them. When we had scalded our throats with boiling coffee, and had affronted our digestive apparatus with several mysteries of confectionery, Our Basso bade the vendor a friendly good-evening, and started off at a run. Our Tenor looked blankly at me. I looked blankly at Our Tenor.

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'I haven't a cent,' said he.—'Nor have I,' I replied.

'Three-and-threepence, if you please,' said the coffee-man.

'My dear sir,' began Our Tenor, 'we have had the misfortune to come out without our pocket-books, and our loose cash happens to be done. We will defray this small liability next time we pass.'

'No, you don't,' said the coffee-man; 'I've been done that way before. You'll pay now, else I'll take it out of you––so there!'

'My dear sir——'

'Oh, no salve. Yer needn't think to come Paddy over me that way. Down with the dust, now.'

'My dear sir, to prove that I haven't the remotest intention of cheating you out of your miserable three-and-threepence, I propose to leave you all my valuables as security. Here is my ring' (a stage jewel), 'an heirloom in my father's family for many generations. In this parcel is a curiosity, sir, that I was but now on my way to present to the curator of the Dunedin Museum; a relic, sir, of the Ko-pi-hi Exploring Expedition, picked up by me in an African jungle, over a year ago. If you will do me the favour of guarding these treasures a few moments until I——'

'Oh, if it comes to that, you know,' stammered the man, shamefacedly. 'Here! I say!' he shouted, as Our Tenor, with a face full of reproachful indignation, was moving off. 'I don't want yer blessed vallyables. Take 'em along with yen Here! Hi!' But Our Tenor was gone, and I after him; and it cost us a sharp run to save our passage; for the little Samson was already unmoored when we got to the end of the jetty.

The moon was just getting well above the hill-tops, and Dunedin, as we receded slowly from it, looked as fair and as white and as peacefully lovely as a dream-city. The bay scenery as we glided down to Port Chalmers was entrancing. Never in daylight could it look so bewilderingly beautiful as in the soft, mellow, radiant, silvery sheen of that moonlit night.

'How beautiful! How soul-soothing!' said Our Basso, with a sigh of admiration as he leaned pensively over the poop-rail.

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'Yes,' hissed Our Tenor, vindictively, 'it is soul-soothing; and by the Lord, if I had my way, you should have something even more soul-soothing than this. You should go down to the bottom to get soothed by mermaids or by sharks, or any other dashed fish that could be induced to eat you—you should!'

'My dear Harry! you seem ruffled,' said Our Basso.

'My dear Tom, for once I am that that I seem,' responded Our Tenor. 'Nothing but fear of consequences prevents me from drowning you. I could push you overboard without the slightest remorse.'

'Ha, ha; berlud!' said Our Basso, melodramatically; and then he went over to make himself agreeable to some people who were eating sandwiches and drinking bottled ale in the moonlight, while Our Tenor went furiously to bed.