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The Spike or Victoria College Review, June 1908
[Review of the activities of the men's hockey club]
"Wery, sir," replied Mr. Weller, "If ever I wanted anything' o' my father, I always asked for it in a wery respectful and obigin' manner. If he didn't give it me, I took it, for fear I should be led to do anythin' wrong by not navin' it. I saved him a world o' trouble in this vay, sir."
—Pickwick Papers.
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The Hockey Club authorities having been unusually dilatory in forwarding for publication reports an particulars of their Club's doings this season, The Spike's untruthful reporter has been commissioned to enquire into the Club 's affairs and to being down a report. Hid findings are as follows : —
The First Eleven are certain to win the Senior Cup, for the Club Captain has said so—and he in as honourable man. The team has attained perfection in the matter of combination, the passing of the forwards being a sight that the gods may sigh for (so says our reporter). He also states that the team will have absolutely no difficulty in overcoming any combination of forces opposed to it; that no team playing against it can expect to be defeated by less than ten goals, and in short, that the Hockey Association would be justified in declaring the result of the Senior Competition forthwith.
The Second Eleven, he finds are achieving feats no less praiseworthy than those accomplished by the Seniors. They too are destined to win the competition the shooting and passing of the forwards, the stopping, the hitting and the passing of the backs, together with their many other good points all prophesy the near approach of the millennium. S. Eichelbaum is captain so the Juniors.
Our reporter regrets to have to state that the III A. team, successors to last year's Third Class Champions condition; they are pining for the glories of he past and are fraught with despair at the prospects for the future. Rex Mason has retired from the playing arena, though our reporter (evidently in a biased
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mood) does not attribute the team's retrogression to any great extent to this fact. We can only hope that the team will take courage and make a noble attempt to win a match now and then.
The III B. team are amply fulfilling expectations. They have not forgotten their record for the 1907 season, and the confidence in their powers which has been displayed by their numerous followers is in no way misplaced—to the present they have not won a single match.