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Answers to Correspondents

A. D-bb-e.—We accept your explanation of your behaviour at the annual meeting of the Tennis Club. We are sorry that your authority to make the statement which you made was called into question.

H. H. D-n-ll.—You have our sympathy. In our opinion an Act should be passed prohibiting the striking of matches in dark places without due warning. Petition Sir Joseph Ward, Bart.

Rev. C-mpt-n.—Quite right. Quite right.

A. Fa-r-.—"Once aboard the lugger and the girl is mine," you say. Your position would not be as secure as you imagine. You would be liable to an action for abduction. If you are really in earnest about the matter, buy a motor-car like—er—like—You are quite sure to win then.

C. A. L. Tre-dw-ll.—I. That "chosen companion" idea of yours interests us exceedingly. We presume that you have been attending the lectures of the Eugenics Society. II. Ask Professor Garrow.

P. B-r-b-dg.—It is absolutely useless your denying the fact. We have prooof positive. Don't be down-hearted, though; all of us have erred and gone astray at some time.

G. M. Cl-gh-rn.—The Elements of Bookkeeping, published in the A.B.C. series, by Stalky & Co., would, we believe, serve your purpose very satisfactorily.

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Prof. M-ck-nz-e.—I. The story you tell has a really classical flavour. It reminds us very much of the class of joke of which Sterne was so fond. II. Yes, we. agree. Expurgated editions should be consigned to Hades.

Prof-ss-r L-by.—Yes, conversaziones are clever advertising dodges. You can never tell what silly fool may give you £50 if you only tickle him the right way.

S. A. B-rn-tt.—Right for once. "If a man is born after his wife's death, the remainder certainly will not vest." The class laughed, did it? Well, so did we.

S. Ei-ch-l—m.—Every dog has his day. Your case is a kind of arithmetical progression: Senior, 2A, 2B; we have worked it out and find that in the year 1915 you will probably get a game for 3B—during the vacation. Your ode, entitled "Facilis Descensus," is too full of fierce invective, bitter personality, morbid introspection and suicidal gloom.